I'll be open and honest from the get go, my life has been that based on no religious or spiritual belief or experience. Ever faced with questions or events pertaining to that nature I met with the greatest amount of negativity and skepticism. To the degree that I found such claims relating to these things somewhat insulting and complete folly.
I guess these things are a matter of positive, negative or zero exposure during upbringing. Not until the past few years have I began questioning the world and my place in it. Attempting to educate myself not in the academic sense but in my own philosophy based on how I alone see life.
I used to think maths and high school science were difficult to study, my own mind is proving to be true test of will and self assumed futility. I have opened my eyes and now see what has driven humanity to try and find answers in the spiritual and religious, for no matter how long I may study my own mind, the more conundrums I encounter for which there is no explanation. I discuss such instances with a beloved friend, we often spend days discussing individual elements. The more we talk, the frequency of those two words 'spirituality' and 'relgion' are used increases.
Is it that I am attaching my own lack of knowledge and understanding to these platforms in order to brush over the holes in my own and indeed humanities knowledge? The concepts of both allow us this ability after all. Or is the reason I keep hitting upon them because there are forces at work which are so influential and relevant that ultimate ignorance is impossible? I know I'm posting this to a place where levels of opinion and belief undoubtedly vary greatly, I feel unable to answer my own questions however. I feel as if I am merely scraping at the surface of my own experience of life.
Recently I have lost people dear to me and have experienced things for which I have no explanation. The kind of thing I would have historically brushed off and dismissed had it not been my own experience.
I lost my father back in 2009 to Cancer and since then I have struggled with the harsh realities of life and death. In just the last couple of months I have lost a nephew and a good friend and hours prior to each passing have experienced vivid dreams of them reaching out to me.
My nephew was unexpected though my friend had also been fighting cancer and we knew there was a high chance of losing him. These dreams were the most profoundly impacting events to have experienced, words simply cannot express the magnitude. Again these are instances which I could easily justify in a spiritual context and it may be where I do. All I know is that I am on a journey of self realisation and it is giving me insights to things impossible to comprehend with a closed mind.
So for anyone who may stumble upon this don't be so quick to judge or be dismissive of the things we do not understand. Open your mind and never be afraid of what you may find when you look in there.
My journey could very well bring me back here from time to time while seeking information and others views. Thank you and take care.
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